Douching

Rinsing out your ass with water before anal sex, usually with a bulb or shower hose, so bottoming is clean; part of a bottom's prep.

Douching is rinsing out your ass with water before sex, usually with a rubber bulb or a shower attachment, so that bottoming is clean and nobody has to worry about mess. It is the most practical and least glamorous part of being a bottom, and it is common: in a large US online study, 52% of men who have sex with men had douched, and 88% of those did it before receptive anal sex.

It is not a medical procedure, not a full enema up into the colon, and not compulsory. It is just the bit of prepping that happens in the bathroom.

How it is done

The gear is simple: a bulb douche from a pharmacy or sex shop, or a shower hose with a nozzle. Most men use only water. The advice from doctors and sex educators is surprisingly consistent:

• Plain lukewarm water, a small amount, low pressure.
• Insert the lubed nozzle only a couple of inches, squeeze slowly, release on the toilet, repeat once or twice until the water runs clear, and stop there.
• Give it 30 to 60 minutes before sex so the last of the water can come out.
• If you can, skip it altogether: fiber and regular bowel movements often keep things clean enough on their own.

The health side

Douching is mostly harmless, but more is not better. Too much water, pressure or rinsing irritates the lining of the rectum and upsets its natural balance, and harsh products make it worse. Researchers have also found that men who douche often have higher rates of HIV and other STIs, and suspect that water-based douching may damage the rectal lining and make it easier for infections to get in. That is one more reason to keep it gentle, to use PrEP or condoms, and to see a doctor about bleeding or pain that doesn't go away.

On the apps and in porn

On the apps "clean" next to "bottom" usually means "douched and ready", and "need time to prep" is the polite way of saying it. In porn the douching never happens on camera, which gives viewers a deeply unrealistic idea of how bottoming works; ask any power bottom or vers guy how long he spent in the bathroom first.

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